My Grandfather's Death

Photo taken in 2007

Till recently death was a distant affair for me. When I used to hear the news of someone dying I would pass on my condolences and move on with my life. But unfortunately this time its not the same. This time the news of someone dying did hurt me a lot. This time this someone was my grandfather.

My grandfather Mr.Ayemperumal was born on 10-Aug-1928. He was born to a rich indian bureaucrat in the French occupied India (now Pondicherry). He did his schooling from Lycée Francaise. As the name suggests his medium of education was in French. He could easily read, write and converse in french. He was an outstanding student, but his active part in the freedom fight ensured his failure in examinations and hence was not awarded any degree by the french govt and the french university. He also refused to take french citizenship (he should have), because he did not want to swear allegiance to the french govt or France.

He was a voracious reader and had a good collection of books. All the books that he has are really old books and might have real antique value. He taught me french from 2000 to 2002. I owe my strong foundation in french language to him, but I however I could not master the language in his life time. Well I will now. Everyone loved him. He was soft spoken and a wonderful human being. Not to mention he was the greatest grandfather.

Prelude to his death started in the month of november or december 2010 when all of a sudden he fell unconscious. He was rushed to the hospital by my uncle and later recuperated and was back to normal life. But anyone who has seen and known him for quite some years would tell that he had lost the previously existing energy and vigor. Still he managed to live a healthy life. Months went by, he even attended my daughter's second birthday. It was a great feeling, four generations of a family getting together at one place.  Then came 2011 and exactly in the month of April 2011 his health began to deteriorate. His excretory system began to fail and he used to struggle a lot before passing urine and stool.

He was then admitted to the Pondicherry Medical Mission (PMM). He was in the hospital for few days but things did not improve. Few days later the doctors at PMM discharged him stating that he will be fine soon and prescribed some tablets and medicines. Few days later the same complications reoccurred. He was taken back to PMM and the doctors at PMM asked us to take him to Apollo Hospital in Chennai. His blood platelet count was low and the doctor at PMM also wrote a covering letter to the doctors at Apollo Hospital, Greems Road, Chennai. He was brought to chennai in an ambulance and was admitted at Apollo Hospital. He was kept in the ICU for few days and was later shifted to the room. He was constantly attended by doctors and after 15 days was discharged. He was diagnosed with Mylodisplasia, a pre leukemia stage. This could mutate to Leukemia (Blood cancer) or also remain dormant and still cause complications. It remained dormant in my grandfather's case and took him away.

In the second week of May 2011 he was declared fit to go home and hence went back to Pondicherry. He remained in bed and was not very much active still he could walk around the house with a supporting stick and could manage to do his daily chores. I went to Pondicherry on June 21st to get my degree certificates and visited him. On June 22nd I obtained my degree certificate from college and went home. I showed the same to everyone and also to my grandfather (thatha). He looked at the certificate carefully and read every single word in the certificate. I could feel that a how a person who was an expert in reading and writing in French, English, Tamil struggled to read the big bold characters in the degree certificate... He was happy to see my degree certificate. He was sitting besides me. We talked for a while. I could see small red patches on his body. They where very few, hopefully nothing to worry, I thought. Then I had to go out with my Uncle to meet the doctor and discuss with him about our grandfather's condition. The doctor did not tell us if his problem could be treated completely. He was only giving tips and measures that could provide temporary relief to him. We grasped what all we could and came home.

It started drizzling on our way home. We had just reached home and heard someone shouting. I ran inside and found out that my grandfather had developed high fever and had started to shiver. God I miss him, he should have been here. Not able to bare with his loss. We switched off the fan and made him lie down and I covered him with a blanket. We then gave him Dolo650. This brought his fever down but his condition was not better. He drank milk. I assumed he was fine and came to my aunt's place and lied down to sleep. Later in the morning I visited him said my goodbye and left for chennai. It was 22nd June wednesday.

The same night I got a call first from my mom and then from my uncle. His condition has become worst. Frequent fever and the red dots have increased in number and had come all over his face and body. For the first time it stuck to me that is this the end? I called up the doctor who treated him at Apollo Hospital and he asked us to bring the patient immediately. The next two days where not auspicious and hence my uncle chose not to bring him to Chennai. He was brought to Chennai on June 25 2011 and for the first time I saw my grandfather completely bed ridden. He was unable to even sit on his own and was struggling to swallow anything solid.

We took him to the doctor and the doctor advised immediate hospitalization and we admitted him to Billroth Hospital in Shenoy Nagar. I frequently visited him in the hospital. The doctor prescribed him some medicines and would visit him once everyday. I visited him with my wife on 29-June-2011 and the very next day 30-June-2011, he suddenly developed breathing complications and they put on an oxygen mask and shifted him to the critical care unit (CCU). I rushed to the hospital. I checked him and his condition was not too good, but he did not loose his consciousness and hence could talk and recognize all of us. From 30th June I was in the hospital everyday from morning till late night. On July 1st 2011 his condition was poor compared to the previous day. He had been put on non-evasive ventilator. His breathing complication increased. He struggled to breath. He did not want to stay in the hospital and wanted to go home. He was suffering from pain as a lot of stuffs where plugged to his body. From 1st July he had also stopped taking food and hence a tube was inserted into his esophagus (food pipe) and the food was being sent in. I again visited him on July 2nd 2011 and saw him in a pathetic condition. He was not able to open his eyes properly and he struggled a lot to breath despite being plugged to the non-evasive ventilator. I called him and he just half opened his right eye saw me and closed again. That was it. My grandfather saw me for the last time. I came out of the CCU as the visiting time was about to get over and others too had to visit him. I had to go to the pharmacy to buy medicines for him. The total bill was Rs6,344/-. I paid and got the medicines and handed over them to the nurse at the CCU and came back home.

On 3-July-2011 at 2:00a.m in the morning, I got a call from my uncle that my grandfather had expired. He said that they are trying to revive him through CPR. It was raining and I rushed to the hospital. By then he had gone forever. After 20mins I was allowed to see him. I went inside the CCU and there I found my grandfather lying lifeless. I called him Thatha... he did not respond. I called again Thatha... he did not respond, I realized, he had indeed died. This never happened in the past. Whenever I used to call him  he will respond, the last time he at least opened his eyes to look at me. He is gone forever. No matter what I do, he will never come back. I touched his hand he was cold. They forced me to leave the place. There was huge formalities to be done. Everyone else was crying and I had to do it. The paper signing stuff was taken care by my uncle. I went to pay the final settlement. It was exactly Rs49,160/-. Then we received the death certificate and some unused medicines. I returned them got the money, by this time the room had been vacated and my grandfather's body had been brought down. it was packed completely. They kept him in an ice box and the ambulance started off. We where on our way to Pondicherry for the last rituals of my grandfather.

My Grandfather Mr.Ayemperumal is now Late Mr. Ayemperumal.

Miss you thatha!